Don't Let Southern Rock Die

A while ago, I downloaded (god bless iTunes) The Black Crowes' "Southern Harmony and Musical Companion." It had been a while since I'd listened to the Crowes, but I was beginning to realize that their songs would come to me occasionally, unbidden, like the memory of a great meal. And damn, was it worth it: the album is huge, mature, and full of soul. (Right now Chris Robinson is caterwauling in the background.) I overlooked SHMC when it first came out; I was young, and the album was too far beyond "Shake Your Moneymaker" for me to grasp its formidable strength. That first album had been my soundtrack for an otherwise dismal senior year of high school. As someone who had little nuance in his emotional life, I couldn't grasp the more nuanced second album. But I'm grasping it now, baby.

And speaking of grasping, I want to acknowledge Apple Computer's near-total mastery over me. Each new product they release inspires me to drool like a fat, hungry baby. This summer I bought the new iPod with the color display, and I love it. Each trek across campus is occupied with music (The Shout Out Louds, Bright Eyes) or Podcasts (On The Media, this really terrible Steelers podcast). Then came the Nano. Gurgle. Then came the Video iPod. Glub.

I spent an afternoon pondering the Video iPod upgrade (my wife--ever supportive of even the stupidest whim--offered to make it my Christmas present) until I realized that I wasn't that interested in spending 2 bucks to watch a video on a 4.5' screen, no matter how good that Fatboy Slim video with Christopher Walken is. I don't commute via public transit, which means I generally have something to do with my eyes. And, as my wife later suggested, we can always believe that music expands us and makes us fuller, richer people, but it's hard to believe that you grow much by watching reruns of "desperate Housewives."

Cheers.

Say My Name

Football is a powerful force in American culture: each weekend, it grabs the attention of viewers around the country and the world, crossing socioeconomic and racial lines and inspiring all sorts of imitation: people playing football in the street, talking trash and practicing their touchdown dances. But one of football's most lasting contributions to American culture must be its players' names. How else would you explain the sudden glut of young LaDainians and Dontarriuses? I like to collect impressive football player names, and I'd like to log some of them here. I invite you to contribute. Foreign names are off-limits, but I'll accept names from all sports.

Here are a few to get us started:

Frostee Rucker (USC Trojans): The spelling indicates that he wasn't named for the Snowman, but for the slushy drink you can buy at the K-Mart food bar. Wouldn't you love to know that story?

D'Qwell Jackson (Maryland Terrapins): This name would have been ordinary and boring, if someone hadn't replaced the u with a w. Thanks, Mom and Dad.

D'Brickashaw Ferguson (UVA Cavaliers): I've seen some alternate spellings of this name, but all include the D'. Is this a trend? Will the next president to be impeached be D'George W. Bush? Will D'Karl Rove go to d'jail?

Sinorice Moss (Miami Hurricanes): This name means "Chinese Rice." Makes sense to me.

More soon. I invite you to contribute, gentle readers.

Tommy Gun

I'm watching the Steelers' game on a tape right now, having already looked at the press wrap-up and stats for the game, and this is obvious to me: Tommy Maddox single-handedly lost the game.

And not for the obvious reason, the INT returned for a touchdown in overtime. And not for the other two interceptions, one of which led directly to a Jags' touchdown, nor for his fumbled snap. Maddox lost the game with his general suckitude as a thrower. Most of his passes have been short or behind receivers. While the boos from the Steelers' crowd seemed premature, he certainly didn't earn himself any credibility. I'm guessing that Ben's knee feels much better now.

It was a rough weekend all around. USC pulled it off against Notre Dame and Michigan clipped Penn State. While it was nice to see Florida State go down, Syracuse was humiliated by Rutgers, and Kansas State continued to stink against Texas Tech, the Loyola Marymount of college football. And then, today, the Bengals and the Ravens won. Yech.

Here's the rundown:

What's good:

LaDanian Tomlinson, who makes everything else happen for San Diego.
Rashean Mathis, corner for the Jags, who deflected (not blocked) a punt and won the game with his INT return. There was talk about the Steelers drafting him in 2003.
The Colts, who will pound and pound on the Rams tomorrow night.
The handsome Carson Palmer.
The Patriots lost. Always cause for celebration.

What's bad:

Touchdown Tommy.
The NFC North. (The Bears and Lions are tied atop the division. At 2-3.)
Miami's rushing game. (Chris Chambers was their top runner today.)
The Texans. Do they dump Carr at the end of the season and draft Leinart? I say they do, and Carr resurfaces in...Arizona.

Questions and comments:

Okay, so I was a bit hasty in jumping on the bandwagon for the Chiefs' D.
How does Matt Millen still have a job?
Can someone help me make a joke about the Vikings and their jackassery on Lake Minnetonka? It either has to do with sailing, or with the horns on their helmets.

On a positive note, CBS is currently showing a Walker Texas Ranger movie. Kick ass, America!